The name of the game

Today's theme is persistence! Well I went and saw the lovely fill Doctor Caroline and only got .1ml put in thinking I am getting close to 'ideal restriction' (I am still thinking this is an urban myth!). To be honest, .1ml did jack sh*t!!! I've got another appointment for Friday week and can't get in any sooner so I'm just going to have to persist, persist, persist and keep going. Jodie & I had a good chat and I'm going to change things up a bit because I have to confess that I haven't been eating as well as I could be and I have to take responsibility for that - fess up - move on and make some changes! I usually only have a coffee first thing in the morning and don't eat until lunch and by doing that I find I'm usually hungrier in the evening so what do I do? - snack! Just like the bad 'ol days…so the snacks are out the window (or in the bin) and I'm going to get back to basics by eating three small meals a day, cutting out the snacks or if I need them, make healthy choices and see how that goes. I'll let you know!

Enough of the whinging and onto better news...I have what I call the 'plethora of pants'. This is a pile of pants gathered over many years of yo-yo dieting, of up and down weight, from size 22 down to 16, there must have been about 20 at one stage, but they have slowly been downsizing with me and are a plethora no more!! I realised on the weekend that there are only 2 pairs left!! They both fit and only one is unwearable (for now), but it won't be long before I would wear them in public. So even though my weight is not shifting as much as I would like, I am definitely continuing to lose inches and if I keep persisting, I will get there. I can't wait for the day that the plethora is gone and I will finally have to go shopping to buy some interim clothes. I'm still a fair way off goal so there will be more sizes to go down, but it will be a good day, the day I can actually buy a pair of size 14 pants (and then size 12)!

I also had another few experiences which showed me how far I've come in the last 12 months. I caught up with a few people I used to work with for lunch last week and it was the first time in a very long time that I wasn't filled with shear dread at the thought of it - I was actually excited about it. Normally I would be loathing it because I would have put on weight and had nothing half decent to wear and just the usual self loathing that goes along with not liking yourself very much. This time though I actually wasn't worried about it at all and I liked how I looked and was quite happy for them to see me, no one said wow look at you, you look fantastic, which was ok because half of them were blokes and I wouldn't expect them too, but I know I looked good and that's all that matters! The other thing was the other day I was heading to the lift in my car park and someone yelled out 'Jen' and I turned to see it was another guy I used to work with many years ago so we had a quick chat and as I walked off I said 'good to see you' and you know what? It actually was! Normally I would have been looking for the first hole to dive into or throwing myself down the elevator shaft, but I skipped off looking forward to the day ahead!!
I like to reflect on my journey and notice these changes that are going on not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. It really is a fantastic experience and I'm really proud of myself :)

P.S.
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